Russell Brand ChatGPT produced this translation.
Can you identify the original?
“In the land where the Whos do play,
Came a teacher one bright day,
Up a mountain high he climbed,
To share wisdom with mankind.
“Cheer up those of you feeling small,
For in Heaven, you'll stand tall.
Those who mourn, do not despair,
Comfort's waiting for you there.
You, the gentle, need not flee,
For the Earth's your property.
Those who thirst for what is right,
Shall be filled, day and night.
Show mercy when you're in a jam,
And receive mercy as a thank you, ma'am.
Those who are pure, just like a dove,
Will have a glimpse of God above.
Peacemakers, please don't ever stop,
For you're God's children, cream of the crop.
Those who suffer for doing good,
In Heaven's kingdom, you've stood.
You're the Earth's salt, please don't fade,
Else you'll be underfoot, I'm afraid.
You're the world's light, shining bright,
You can't be hidden, try as you might.
So let your light before men glow,
That they may your good works know.
And glorify your Heavenly Dad,
Which will surely make Him glad.”
“Don't think that I came here to quash,
Law or prophets, oh my gosh!
I'm not here to destroy, but fulfill,
And that, my friends, is the real deal.
Truth be told, for all to hear,
‘Til Heaven and Earth disappear,
Not a dot, not a dash will be obsolete,
From the law, till all is complete.
Break a rule, teach others so,
In Heaven, you'll be considered low.
But if you follow and teach the right,
In Heaven, you'll shine bright.
So listen up, I tell you true,
Your goodness must be brand new.
Beyond the scribes and Pharisees,
Or Heaven's kingdom, you won't seize.
You heard it said in olden days,
‘Don't kill, or you'll pay.'
But now I say, if you're mad without cause,
You'll face judgement's claws.
And if you've wronged your brother, friend,
Before the altar, make amends.
Leave your gift, seek him, say,
‘Let's make peace, without delay.'
Agree with your adversary, make it quick,
Or you'll end up in a sticky wick.
Lest he hand you to the judge,
Who'll demand every grudge.
Look not with lust, it's a sin, it's true,
Like committing adultery, it's a rue.
And if your eye leads you astray,
Pluck it out, throw it away.
It's better to lose one part you see,
Than your whole body, cast in the sea.
And if your hand leads you to offend,
Cut it off, this is the end.”
“And if your wife you wish to part,
Give her a paper from the heart.
But let me tell you, this is true,
To cause her to commit adultery won't do.
If you've heard from those of the past,
Don't break your oath, let your promise last.
But now I say, don't swear at all,
Not by the sky, so wide and tall.
Nor by the Earth, beneath your shoe,
Nor Jerusalem, that view.
Don't swear by your head, black or white,
For you can't change a single mite.
Let your words be ‘yes' and ‘no', that's the way,
Anything more leads you astray.
‘An eye for an eye,' you've heard them speak,
But I say turn the other cheek.
If sued for your coat, give your cloak too,
It's a kinder thing to do.
And if you're asked to walk a mile,
Go two, do it with a smile.
Give to those who ask of thee,
And turn not from those who wish to borrow free.
Love thy neighbor, you've been told,
But love your enemy, be bold.
Bless those who curse, do good to those who hate,
Pray for those who spitefully berate.
So you may be children of the Most High,
For He is kind to the just and sly.
If you love only those who love you,
What reward is there for you to accrue?
And if you greet only your kin,
Do you do more than others then?
In the end, be perfect, do,
Just like your Heavenly Father, too.”
I was wondering how many people would be able to identify the original if posted it verbatim, but I feared that it was nearly no one, it would be too saddening.
